Kikyo's Hurt & Pain
by Patriot1776
Summary: Songfic, set to Nine Inch Nails' song 'Hurt'. Kikyo's secret is discovered again and she's forced to leave another village she tries to settle in. After she leaves, she encounters a certain familiar hanyou and his group.


Kikyo's Hurt & Pain

By: Patriot1776

Song: Hurt

Lyrics: Trent Reznor

Once again, Kikyo was walking away from a village. She had been keeping the kids at it company for several days until one of the women of the village had seen her walking toward the forest to meet up with her soul collectors. When she had tried to come back all the village men had confronted her with clubs telling her as an evil spirit to leave or they would call a priest to exorcise her. She'd turned and left without any further word. She had managed to get a good rapport with the kids going this time, and she had seen tears rolling down their faces as the men had confronted her. Some of them had even broke down and started crying as she walked off.

"Curse you Naraku for doing this ALL to me! Curse you Urasue for calling me back to this world against my will!" Kikyo seethed in her mind, her face maintaining it's sad composure. She summoned a soul collector to her, held out her hand, and commanded the soul collector to bite it. It did not want to at first, but a weak pulse of holy energy shedirected at it persuaded it. It clamped down hard, and the pain surged through Kikyo's hand, and she commanded it to lay off. The soul collector then released itself from her hand and flew off. She saw the bruises, but again, no blood. She closed her eyes and bowed her head in sadness as the memories of the past came roaring back to her.

_I hurt myself today,  
To see if I still feel.  
I focus on the pain.  
The only thing that's real.  
The needle tears a hole.  
The old familiar sting.  
Try to kill it, all away.  
But I remember everything._

_What have I become,  
My sweetest friend?  
Everyone I know Goes away, in the end.  
And you could have it all.  
My empire of dirt._

_**I will let you down.  
I will make you hurt.**_

Kikyo walked on for several hours. Soon however, a soul collector came and, giving her a soul it then spoke to her telepathically. 'I see. So the group approaches. Lead the way.' She replied to it, and started to follow it into the forest. The group approaching was the new group that that hanyou she had met and fell in love with fifty years before had put together, and as always, her reincarnation was with them. The soul collector led her to a spot where she could easily observe the group as they strolled past, but yet would also remain downwind and invisible to the hanyou's keen sense of smell, as she didn't want the hanyou to rush over to her. After she was in position, she used the spirit properties of her resurrected body to fade out of existence and become non-corporeal as the group approached, to further mask herself. This was a tiring and very draining thing for her to do and she often required a complete replenishment of souls soon afterwards.

The group approached, the hanyou going on as usual about his companions being weak and unable to keep up, the others looking a little tired. Her reincarnation eventually had enough and used the command and spell she herself had invented all those years before as a way to force the hanyou to heel when he needed it or in case he suddenly decided to attack her. As the hanyou started to back to his feet, Kikyo, in her non-corporeal state at the present moment, began to feel that familiar, overwhelming depression overtake her.

'InuYasha,' she thought. 'why did you swear to go to hell with hell me? The first time I tried to take you, it was out of anger and I did not know the truth at the time of what happened. I know you won't forget about me, but you need to stop coming after me whenever you see me. You torture Kagome everytime you do. InuYasha, we've had our chance. Happiness is now beyond reach for me, but I can't rest peacefully again until Naraku is destroyed. You however, have recieved a second chance at happiness. Do not blow it.' Kikyo thought as she started to sneak away in her non-corporeal state so she could reassume her physical form, recieve more souls, and then hunt a youkai to blow off the steam inside that had just built up.

_I wear this crown of thorns Upon my liar's chair.  
Full of broken thoughts I cannot repair.  
Beneath the stains of time,  
The feelings disappear.  
You are someone else.  
I am still right here._

_What have I become,  
My sweetest friend?  
Everyone I know Goes away in the end.  
And you could have it all.  
My empire of dirt._

_**I will let you down.  
I will make you hurt.**_

_If I could start again,  
A million miles away.  
I would keep myself.  
I would find a way._

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Even though this is set to the Nine Inch Nails song 'Hurt', what inspired this was listening to Johnny Cash's version of the same song.


End file.
